Broken Bird - Eren x Reader Ch. 1

~Chapter One: Welcome to the Cadet Corps~

One Year Later

You had washed your tunic, and now stretched it out on the wooden table, trying your damnedest to make it look less wrinkly than it obviously was. You let go of its frayed, slightly ripped edge, and the shirt almost immediately shrank in on itself. It almost looked as if it was going into the fetal position.

You frowned. This was definitely not going like you planned.

After several more minutes of struggling with the shirt, you gave up entirely, throwing it over your head in all its semi-cleaned, wrinkly glory.

At least you didn't smell anymore. You have to be grateful for the little things, or so you learned.

But this? This was important to you. Today was the day you were finally going to do it.

Today, registration opened for the Cadet Corps. All year, during the day, you'd been hard at work in the fields, doing whatever tedious task your supervisor had assigned for you, earning yourself a measly income. At night, you'd been training and training, working on getting better in every aspect of combat and stealth that you could. Anything that could help you get into the Military Police. Unfortunately, combat training by yourself could only get you so far.

Top ten, you reminded yourself. This isn't a game. I've got to make top ten. And besides, training is what the next three years are for.

You stepped out of the tiny room you had rented in Trost, and exited onto the street, patting yourself down and brushing off the invisible dust that always seemed to cling to clothing.

You looked up at the early-morning stars shining brightly overhead and drew your eyebrows together sadly. You twisted the ring on your right index finger absently. You had developed a habit of doing that over the last year. Especially when you thought about her.

You were right. These are far more beautiful than those in the Undercity.

You walked a ways down the street, hands in the pockets of your trousers. You knew the women above ground were supposed to wear skirts; somehow, you never saw the point. Skirts were impractical. If you wore one in the Undercity, you wouldn't last an hour. Either the cold or the men would get to you. You still didn't know which one was worse, but you saw no reason to start wearing skirts now.

A half an hour, you thought, looking up at the sky. Registration opens at dawn.

You knew you wouldn't be starting actual training for another week or so, but you couldn't help but go through everything you'd worked hard to learn in your mind.

Strike hard and fast.

Stick to their blind spots.

Breath in through your nose, out through your mouth.

Never let them know what you are.

You knew that having "Undercity" listed as your place of birth would be a surefire way of getting the Military Police to hone in on who you were, so... you'd have to lie. You didn't make any friends over the last year. You felt no desire to, but you did overhear some of the other field workers' conversations. Jinae District was relatively obscure, not too much going on there. It'd have to do.

In an hour's time, you would officially be [Name] [Surname] of Jinae, trainee in the Cadet Corps.

You couldn't tell whether you wanted to laugh or cry. Maybe both.

There was a nagging fear at the back of your mind that you'd have to fill out some paperwork, but hopefully the paper-shortage in Wall Rose would allow them to cut some corners.

You weren't sure how to explain to the registry that you didn't even have the education required to write down your full name.

Ten minutes or so later, you came across a building with ivy crawling it's way up the side. Perfect.

Grabbing hold of one of the dark, leafy vines, you hoisted your lithe body up and climbed quietly to the roof. You still had some time to kill, and you wanted to watch the sunrise.

You've had a year of seeing it, and you're still not tired of it. You doubted you ever would be.

Every time you saw one of the wonders of the world above, you'd think of her. You found yourself wishing, each time, that she'd be there to witness it with you. But each time, you'd never been anything but alone.

You climbed over the peak of the roof to sit on the other side. As you walked carefully over the loose shingles, you froze.

Someone else had gotten there before you.

You weren't alone.

The figure rotated from his spot at the edge of the roof, looking at you in confusion with brilliant green eyes.

"...Hi," you spat out intelligently.

He quirked an eyebrow and tilted his head, shaggy brown hair falling in his eyes. "Hi."

You both stood in silence for a few seconds, staring at each other on the desolate rooftop.

Awkward.

"What, are you some kind of criminal?" the boy asked suspiciously.

"No!" you answered quickly, defensive, feeling a bead of sweat form on your forehead. Shit, am I that obvious? Really fucking smooth! you thought. "I just have something I need to do soon and I couldn't sleep, so I wanted to watch the sunrise." What are you doing? You don't need to explain yourself to this guy, stupid!

He seemed to deliberate on your answer for a moment, before nodding and turning back to face the sky. "Alright then. We can share the roof."

You stared at him for a few moments, confused. Who does he think he is? I'll use the damned roof if I want to use the roof! you thought, crossing your arms across your chest.

You were too lost in your internal sassing to notice you hadn't moved since the boy spoke. "What, you just gonna stand there? You can sit, you know. Sun's coming up in a minute."

You started and tentatively moved to sit next to the boy, feet dangling off the edge of the roof. You both sat in silence.

"What's happening today that's so big you can't even sleep?" he questioned.

You were surprised by his curiosity, but saw no reason to lie. You narrowed your eyes. "I'm signing up for the Cadet Corps."

He turned his head towards you, eyebrows furrowed. "You don't look like the soldier type."

You looked at him indignantly. "Who are you to judge what 'type' I am?"

He looked away again. "No one, I suppose." He paused. "I'm registering, too."

You weren't shocked. Your smile was almost feral. "So we'll be competing for top ten."

The boy snorted. Outright snorted. "Yeah, right. I'm not competing for anything. I'm joining the Survey Corps."

That was enough to wipe the smile off your face and you balked. "Are you serious? You're not even going to try for the Military Police? Are you suicidal?"

"I'm going to work my hardest and become the best at killing titans. Then, I will kill the titans. All of them. If I happen to end up in the top ten, then great. If not, it won't ruin my day."

You looked away from him, thinking that maybe you wouldn't like this guy very much.

"So, I guess you're one of the cowards who wants to earn an easy life by riding with the Military Police then, huh?"

Your head snapped towards him, face curling into a sneer. Oh, yeah. I definitely don't like this guy. "Is valuing my life really a trait to scoff at?"

"What life?" he shot back. "Cowering behind the walls in the hope you'll never have to see a titan isn't much of a life. You're just livestock, waiting to be slaughtered and eaten." He turned his head away from you, a frown on his face.

"Oh? And what would you know of cowering? I'm sure you haven't seen any of the evil this world has to offer, and you certainly haven't seen any titans. Those who have are dead."

He fell completely silent and glared at you mercilessly.

Your voice was quiet as you continued. "Once you get a taste of what real fear is, you won't be so keen on going nose to nose with a monster."

His eyes narrowed. "And you have so much experience in dealing with evil and fear?"

You looked out towards the sky, lips falling into a deep frown. "...Yeah. Some."

You hadn't even noticed the sun coming up. He looked at the sky and then back to you, green fire in his eyes and stood up, turning away from you. "I'm heading over to the military headquarters. Registration opens soon."

You sat for a few more minutes, staring at the brilliant oranges and pinks splayed across the sky.

You frowned.

That guy is suicidal.

~

Eren stomped away from you, anger ebbing away at his heart.

Great job, Eren. Making friends already, he thought heatedly. Are they all gonna be like that? I sure as fucking hell hope not.

He returned as quickly as possible to the room where he, Armin, and Mikasa were staying, opening to door without so much as a thought for courtesy. He looked at their sleeping forms and frowned. "Hey!" he barked. "Get up! It's time to go!"

Armin sat up quickly, blonde hair sticking up in a messy halo and looked around in a panic. Mikasa didn't move. She simply opened one eye and glared at her step-brother.

"There are kinder ways to wake someone up in the morning, Eren," she said scolding.

"Sure. Next time I'll be sure to splash water on your lazy ass."

Armin looked absolutely horrified at the thought, but shook it off a second later, along with his bed-hair. "Where did you go?"

"I just went for a walk. Met another registrant."

"Oh, yeah?" Armin asked curiously. "What was he like?"

Eren pursed his lips, looking at nothing in particular. "She's going to try for the Military Police. She doesn't matter."

Eren's frowned deepened. If you didn't matter, why did what you said bother him so much?

~

"Sasha Braus. B-R-A-U-S. Dauper Village," said a brunette with her mop of brown hair tied back into a high ponytail. Bits of hair fell down into her face, obscuring it slightly. Overall, she looked physically fit. Competition.

"Sasha Braus. You are assigned to the 104th Trainees Division. Next!" shouted the angry looking man with the clipboard, waving away the girl and glaring at the next in line. "Name and place of birth."

You looked away, overcome with relief that the registration process was verbal and not written. You were double relieved that it seemed only some of the registrants decided to spell out their names, but you had yet to see the man with the clipboard ask someone to spell their name. You had a small thought to look around again and observe your competition, but decided against it. It didn't matter, anyway. Stats show that more than half of them would end up dropping out or dying in the first six months. That's when the contenders for the top ten really begin to show themselves. You played with the ring on your finger.

I promise you, Amelia, I will make it to the end.

"Eren Jaeger," said a familiar voice.

You looked curiously up to the front of the line where the guy from the roof stood with a small, blonde boy and beautiful girl with long, black hair.

Pfft. Figures.

He stood there, looking as proud and angry as ever, eyebrows furrowed.

Guy needs to calm the fuck down for -

"Shiganshina."

All the blood drained from your face.

You weren't the only one, either. It seemed like everyone within earshot had turned to look at the boy from Shiganshina District.

You've got to be kidding me... how is he even alive?

As it turns out, the two he was standing with, Arlert and Ackerman, were also from Shiganshina.

You then felt a very small, familiar bug called 'guilt' begin to crawl it's way under your skin.

"And what would you know of cowering?"

He's not cowering. He's here to join the damned Survey Corps. After having seen what I'm sure he's seen, that's about as far from 'cowering' as it gets. It's... brave.

"You haven't seen any of the evil this world has to offer."

Shiganshina witnessed first-hand how bad the world gets. I was miles and miles away, and I still had nightmares about just what I'd heard through gossip in downtown... I can't even imagine...

"You certainly haven't seen any titans."

He's probably seen more titans than anyone else not in the Suicide Corps. Damn it, I'm so stupid...

"Those who have are dead."

He must have lost so much.

"Once you get a taste of what real fear is, you won't be so keen on going nose to nose with a monster."

Great job, [Name]. Making friends already.

Oh, Sina, I'm a piece of shit.

~

"Name and place of birth."

"[Name] [Surname]. Jinae District."

"104th Trainees Division, [Surname]. Report to the Cadet Corps HQ a week from today. Next!"

That was it? you thought, walking away. All this time worried I wouldn't be able to get in, and that was it?

Guess they can't afford to be picky nowadays.

You heard very faintly the voice of the freckled boy who had stood behind you in line. "Marco Bodt, Jinae District."

Hey, looks like I've got friends from home, you thought wryly. Here's hoping Jinae isn't a small as they say it is.

You passed the group from Shiganshina as you were leaving the HQ. You could feel the boy, Jaeger, look at you as you walked by.

You averted your eyes and stared straight ahead, iron in your eyes, the whole way out.

~

A week later, you were finally there.

Finally standing in the sweltering sunlight wearing thick trousers, knee-high boots, and a dark, heavy jacket. Not to mention the criss-crossing straps that seemed to pinch you in all the wrong places.

You thought you might be sick.

You heard the instructor, Keith Shadis, harassing the poor kid named Armin from down the line a bit. You vaguely recognized him as one of the Shiganshina trio. You could swear in that moment that his voice went up about three octaves in fear.

You would have smiled if you weren't afraid you were about to lose your breakfast.

Shadis made his way down through the line, stopping at every doe-eyed recruit to give them shit simply for existing. You swallowed what felt like a stone in your throat.

Oh Sina, you were sweating like a pig. Is it always this hot in Trost? Or is it the uniform? Is it just me, am I nervous? Come on, suck it up!

You noticed Shadis passing by the green-eyed boy and black-haired girl from Shiganshina. There was no need to toughen them up or put the fear of God in them; they'd already gone through their rites of passage.

Some poor sod from Trost was picking himself up off the ground from a vicious headbutt for wanting to live the high life in the Capital, courtesy of Instructor Badass, when the devil himself stopped in front of you.

"WHO THE HELL ARE YOU."

You plastered a look of pure steel on your face. "[Name] [Surname] of Jinae, SIR!" You were pleased your voice sounded much stronger than you felt. Especially considering your knees felt like jelly beneath you.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE, CADET."

"To join the Military Police, sir!"

Shadis looked at you scornfully. Thinking back to the way he'd handled the Trost kid, you thought maybe you should have said "Garrison Regiment" instead.

"What makes you want to join the Police?"

You gulped, but your resolve didn't fade. "To serve justice, sir."

"Interesting," he said thoughtfully, "that a slob like you wants to serve justice. TUCK IN YOUR SHIRT, [SURNAME]. The Military Police don't deal in your brand of shit!"

You would never admit it and promised to probably pummel anyone who mentioned it, but you squeaked in fear and hurried to tuck in your shirt, hands shaking. Shadis moved on to the next cadet, the same freckled boy from registration.

With your shirt tucked in more neatly than ever before in your life, you stood at attention and looked around you at the other cadets. You caught the boy from Shiganshina, Jaeger, looking at you out of the corner of his green eyes. As soon as yours met his, he looked away and stared straight ahead, fierce determination evident on his features.

You swayed a little where you stood, and it had nothing to do with the downright attractive shade of his irises. Not that you'd ever admit that, either.

"FOURTH ROW, ABOUT FACE!"

You pivoted, grateful for a reason not to have to look at Jaeger for a second longer.

~

Eren was glad that Shadis decided to pass him by. It was hot as hell, and he wasn't sure he'd be able to speak without his voice cracking from being so dry.

Yeah, it was dry. That was it. It had nothing to do with slight pull of nervousness in his chest.

He glanced at Mikasa. She looked as stony as ever, a look of complete self-control on her face.

Damn, he wished he could that.

"[Name] [Surname] of Jinae, SIR!"

He turned slightly too look at you. You swayed slightly where you stood and your skin looked clammy, but your voice was stronger than most of the other trainees here and your face held a mask of stoicism and determination.

Hell, he thought, astonished. She's serious about making top ten!

Shadis finished his interrogation and moved on. You clearly looked relieved but had to keep readjusting your feet to stay standing. You looked like you might collapse. Maybe it's too hot? Eren thought.

Your eyes flicked in his direction and he avoided them, looking straight ahead.

Not before he noticed the pretty [eye color] of your irises, though.

~

Once you were nauseous, lightheaded, and weak-kneed from the unrelenting heat on the training field, Shadis finally finished with his harsh dehumanization of the 104th trainees.

You tried to maintain your composure on the way back to the mess hall, watching the pony-tailed girl from Dauper, Sasha, run her millionth lap. You couldn't help but feel a twinge of pity for her.

Quite frankly, you would have taken the potato, too. Old habits die hard.

You heard the chatter and bustle of all of your fellow trainees around you, but really had no interest in joining them. They were competition, nothing more. Making friends was pointless.

You fell behind the large group quickly enough, unsteady on your feet. Finally, you were almost to the mess hall. You could hardly believe it. Just a few more feet -

Your eyes could have popped out of your head when you felt your knees buckle.

"Oof, shit - " you cursed, rapidly approaching the hard ground. You squeezed your eyes shut and tried to brace yourself for impact.

It never came, though. You felt a pair of strong arms wrap themselves around your waist, preventing you from falling. You opened one eye cautiously.

"How do you expect to be in the Military Police if you can't last a single day of standing around and doing nothing? That's basically their entire job description."

Your face turned a deep, embarrassing red.

Eren helped you to stand up, keeping a steadying hand on your waist. "You good?"

"I'm fine, Jaeger," you spat, looking at him fiercely. You knew you reacted a bit... harshly because of your embarrassment. You couldn't help it.

He looked at you in surprise and then anger (you were beginning to realize it was a frequent expression for him), and then turned on his heel, heading for the mess hall. "Fine. Whatever."

You closed your eyes and took a deep, calming breath. "Wait. Jaeger."

He stopped and turned to face you once again.

You met his gaze. "What were doing all the way back here and not with your friends?"

He actually looked a little flustered at your question, cheeks turning red and eyes lowered. "I... told them to go ahead. I noticed you didn't look good, and I just wanted to make sure you made it back okay."

He was worried about me? After what I said?

You looked at the ground in shame. "Thank you. And... I'm sorry."

He looked genuinely confused. "What are you sorry for?"

You felt your cheeks flush again. "For what I said before."

He looked smug. "Oh, well then. I forgive you."

You looked up at him and crossed your arms. "Don't start being all cocky! I still think you're an idiot."

He scoffed. "I still think you're a coward."

"Fine!" you said, pushing past him.

To your horror, your knees buckled again and you fell against him.

"You know, if you wanted me to touch you, there are better ways to go about doing it," he said, a clear smirk in his voice as he held you up.

You gritted your teeth in anger. "Fuck you. Help me up."

"Whatever you say, boss," he mocked, wrapping an arm around your waist and helping you up the stairs to the mess hall. Once you reached the top, you leaned against the wall gratefully.

"Don't tell anyone about this," you said. You meant for it to sound like a demand, but instead it came out as a weak plea. You could have died from shame.

Eren just laughed. How infuriating. "Fine."

Sina, you thought angrily, gritting your teeth. I hate that guy.